The obligatory December post…

The obligatory December post…


Hey everyone. How’s it hangin? December huh? Piece of cake.

After spending 2.5 hours in a kindergarten classroom this afternoon, I took all 3 kiddos to Costco and thought “whelp, I might as well get them dinner now, then I won’t have to cook. And bonus – it’s mega cheap.”

Always a mistake. Always.

And that’s how Costco gets you every time. Then you find yourself in the middle of hotdog/pizza mayhem….

“Moooooom, can you cut my pizza?”

“I want my own drink!”

“Can I get the ketchup myself?”

“I have to go to the bathroom”

And so on and so forth.

Since all of them are too old to be strapped into anything, they just get up and leave to pursue such requests whenever they want. There was never more than 30 seconds when all 4 of us were sitting at the table at the same time during dinner. I was 100% sure someone would be left behind. All the lady at the table next to me could do was laugh.

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This one couldn’t be bothered to put down her phone.

And then…it was time to shop.

About halfway into my “quick Costco run” we happened upon the Lindor Truffle sample table. The sweet lady must have seen the exhaustion in my eyes. The fact that I was literally leaning on my cart as I plodded along, step by step. My voice was hoarse from my afternoon of kindergarten “herding”. I had spatters of dried, white toothpaste on my brand new coat (because #momscanthaveanythingnice). She gave each kid a treat and then grabbed my hand and filled it full.

“Mom’s get one of each” and she gave me a wink.

You guys. Santa is real. He’s that elderly lady with a saucy South American accent that works at the Lindor truffle sample table at Costco.

God. Bless. her.

If she had handed me a Diet Coke, I most definitely would have cried.

So yeah – I’m sure that’s how everyone’s December days go down. I braved Wal-Mart yesterday. I came out surprisingly unscathed and ahead of schedule. Well done Wal-Mart.

Besides the extra errands, we have done the occasional Christmas crap.

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We hunted and killed our tree. My gigantic brother just used it as a walking stick as we headed back down the mountain. Good thing we brought him. I couldn’t even climb up the hill – I had to crawl. Sorels = worthless.

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And then decorating our kill – without any sass or attitude. #christmascheer

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We even made it to our delightful church Christmas breakfast. This was the best pic I could get. And not one single child cried on Santa’s lap. I’m heartbroken. Where has the time gone?

Here’s the good news.

Preston asked for a…butler. (“You know, to make my bed and get me pizza and stuff.”)

And Ellsie asked for…a real life barn owl. (“Because I love owls, mom.”)

Santa was dying.

Sandra asked for…we have no idea. She still does not make any sense. Hope you like Legos little girl.

I do have some sad news. I do not think we will be sending Christmas cards out this year. I know, I know. It’s not that December has been super intense. It’s more that we haven’t seen Dave since the beginning of the month, and he won’t be home until Christmas Eve. Can I get a collective BOOOOOOO…..? So don’t feel left out. It’s not you, it’s me.

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Aaaaaannnnnd can anyone guess what I will be doing until the wee hours of the morning? Because the kindergartners need more sugar.

Only 2 days of school left. 2 freaking days. Blogging is definitely the most productive thing I can be doing right now.

Merry Christmas to all and to all a good night!

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