That one time it was Valentine’s Day.

That one time it was Valentine’s Day.


Hey! Remember when it was Valentine’s Day? I vowed that this year was going to be the year of “toning it down”. So first up – Valentine’s Day.

I really, really wanted to do super cute homemade valentines for the kids to pass out.

Step 1 to eliminating stress – ignore anything my brain tells me to do.

So I asked the kids super casually, not baiting the question at all….

Me: “Do you guys want to buy your valentines from the store? Or do you want to make your own super cool ones with me?”

Kids: “STORE!”

Whatever.

Ells picked Hello Kitty with Ring Pops (barf) and Pres picked Guardians of the Galaxy and Kit Kats (slightly better).

One week….ONE WEEK before Valentine’s Day both had already written their names and the names of their classmates on their cards.

MIRACLE.

So two nights before we all sat down to attach said candy, to said already addressed Valentines, I got out some cute ribbon out and Dave tackled it like it was a live grenade.

Dave: “NO! NO RIBBON! WE ARE KEEPING IT SIMPLE!”

Me: “What?!

Dave: “NO!”

And then he literally grabbed all the Hello Kitty Valentines and gross Ring Pops and went psycho with the stapler.

Dave: “DONE. See how much time you saved? They are 4 years old, they don’t care about ribbon, all they care about is the candy.”

Touche. Dave. Touche.

Behold.

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I know it’s not the end of the world, but…..sigh.

Also. for those of you that follow me on Facebook and/or Instagram, you’ve seen this. The most amazing Valentine ever created in the history of Valentines. It’s for Pres’s teacher “Mrs. Ball”.

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I actually did end up showing this pic to Mrs. Ball after our parent teacher conference on Valentine’s Eve. She glanced at it, and smiled. She said “Oh I get that stuff all the time”. And I wanted to say, “But….Did you read it? Like, really read it? And did you see the stickers?!” And now I feel like the biggest idiot. Did she know that Pres did not know what he was writing? Or does she think my kid knows about that kind of slang yet? Does she think I’m one of those parents? I mean, I’m immature, sure, but in a hilarious way. And it’s not like I can be like “Hey Mrs. Ball, remember that ‘balls’ Valentine? I hope it you aren’t offended, because it should be the funniest thing you’ve ever seen. EVER.”

Sigh.

Dave and I never really make Valentine’s plans, because we’re old and boring and what not. But I surprised him with a day date – lunch and a movie. And I even bought tickets to the nerd movie Jupiter Ascending he’s been wanting to see. Which was horrible, but proves my love for Dave exceeds my hate for Channing Tatum. THERE, I SAID IT. He looks like a gorilla, and in this movie they made him look even worse.

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He’s supposed to be a human/wolf hybrid….thing. But he looks like an elf, with really gross yellow hair. When Mila Kunis kissed him I was like….

One last note, as I’m reading this to Dave (I always do before I publish a blog post) he goes “Hey! I thought about Valentine’s Day this year too!”. Yes, yes he did folks. Here I am, declaring that Dave thought about Valentine’s day more than a day ahead of time. I’ve recently been taking Muay Thai classes (more on that later) and he got me these bad boys….

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Shin guards….they’re shin guards….

BOOM.

Happy Valentine’s Day!

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